The last decade was full of transformation. As much as I would like to believe it was because of my ambition, the changes began because I didn’t have a choice. I was backed in a corner and had to fight my way out.

At the onset of this decade, I was a mama of a three-year-old Kevin, pregnant with Damian, photographer, and an Air Force wife. I’m ending it in my second year of graduate school in physiology + neuroscience, with my sons growing at my side as I move forward with applying to medical school as a single mom. It was heartbreak, but that was eclipsed by love, growth, and resilience.

The lessons were unlike anything I expected, but in the process I was introduced to an essential part of myself that I will never let go of. While I’m responsible for my own decisions and behavior, I could not be where I am without my family, especially my mom.

I will never take another’s man's name, but I decided to honor the role my mom has played in my life by taking her maiden name. After thinking about it for a couple of years, I applied to have my last name changed to Andrea Molina. They set my court date for September 11, 2019, and I walked out of that room with tears in my eyes after the judge enthusiastically agreed to make it official. When I first moved out during my divorce, I couldn’t sign a lease on an apartment because I wasn’t used to having power over my own choices. I was married at a young age, and trained to defer decisions to another person.

Now I’ve named myself and thanked this decade for bringing us where we are.